Sunday, January 28, 2007

Little Miss Sunshine (Drama 2006)

Nominated for best picture?! Bullshit man, no way this movie is even remotely in the same category. Yeah, so I made all of the necessary preparations to block off time this evening to watch this and boy howdy was I disappointed. This movie sucked; I don't see the point in watching a super dysfunctional family try to succeed in one of the most useless aspects of their lives. Sure, they had a goal and they didn't give up, but what does that really show? It shows me that the reason this family is so fucked up is because their priorities are in the gutter.

The characters, I'll admit, were an unusual bunch, but besides the after school special shit concerning family unity, what was so magnificent about the rest of the film? Nothing. Some of the quirky dialog got some chuckles, but that surely wasn't enough to label this as a comedy. The only thing I'm thankful for is that I was able to watch most of this movie in 2x speed, thus avoiding the full 101 minute waste of my life.
Rating - D

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Saw III (Thriller 2006)

You know, you gotta be pretty demented to be able to think of all of the death contraptions in these Saw movies. This last installment surely didn't pull any punches in the "crazy shit" category so at least they're keeping with their roots.

If you've seen any of the other films you'll pretty much know what to expect. This movie followed the same equation as the others, so there wasn't any updates in terms of originality, but that doesn't mean it wasn't a good movie. I think they'll have to stop after the 4th, just because I could see a continuing series like this being very repetitive and less appealing.
Rating - B

Sunday, January 21, 2007

Idiocracy (Comedy 2006)

I guess I was expecting a little more outta this one since the creator of Office Space did it, but boy did it fall short. The movie did make me laugh on numerous occasions, but it just wasn't good enough to get a decent rating. The humor was very low-brow and I'm all for that, but not to this extent. I would compare it to The Naked Gun, from back in the 80's. That movie also cracked me up, but then again I was only 8. I no longer associate myself with that age demographic and because of that same reason, I didn't find this movie too appealing.

The intro did have an interesting concept behind it: Smart people are not procreating as fast as dumb people are, so in 500 sum years, civilization would have regressed to a genetic mix of very dumb people. I can dig that. If Mike Judge could've just went with that idea and made it into a comedic documentary instead of creating an asinine story about some very uninteresting characters, I think the final product would have yielded something more memorable. I guess some writers/directors can only strike gold once.
Rating - F

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

The Painted Veil (Drama 2006)

If I would've known in advance that this film was about adultery, I would have voted for a different movie. This film was much like any slow-moving English drama. I don't know why, but Howards End comes to mind even though I never even saw it. What I do remember was that the trailer was so dull and mind numbing that I got very sleepy just by watching it. This movie evokes similar reactions. If you're even moderately sleepy, I would bet a Wendy's meal that you'll pass out. Lucky for this film, I kept on reminding myself that I had just blown close to $9 on a ticket and was not going to let it go to waste.

The movie's plot was just so unpleasant. A venomous she-devil of a woman cheats on her bacteriologist husband with a complete turd named Liev Schreiber (God I hate this actor). To get back at the wife, the husband drags her along to a remote village in the middle of China where a Cholera epidemic has just taken place. While there, the couple "find themselves" and learn to forgive. Listen up kiddies: Forgiveness is for pussies! You should only forgive people if they make a decision without knowing the whole story and they truly feel like a complete ass because of it. Unfortunately, most of the time this is not the case and people make decisions because they are selfish fuckers; and Naomi Watts in this movie was one very selfish bitch. I don't care if you're a "bored woman" living in the free spirited flapper-era of the 1920s...your married ass is not permitted to go and fuck the first thing with a dick that makes you chuckle...that is when your call sign changes into "hooker". Edward Norton should have pushed her into a river with a bunch of diseased corpses and watched, with a tub of kettle corn, to see what happens. Fuck forgiveness; she allowed herself to be mounted by another guy, how is that even remotely forgivable!! So frustrating when people make such stupid decisions in movies.

Anyway, I am obviously highly biased towards the plot's driving forces and consequently am not able to give a fair judgment. If you want my opinion though, I felt that the movie was much too slow and fairly pointless for all the minutes spent watching it. When the movie does finally end, you get up, give a little grunt, and adjust yourself prior to following the little orange lights that lead you out of the theater. That's all I remember and that's all that matters. Boo
Rating - C

Sunday, January 07, 2007

Children of Men (Drama 2006)

I've been waiting to see this movie ever since the trailer first came out last year. I had hoped that since the music was inspirational enough, that perhaps by some off chance, the actual film would follow through on what was shown in the short 3 min snippet. In a one-liner: I was not disappointed.

The story is simple enough; in the near future, women have mysteriously become infertile and within a short number of decades, everyone on Earth would have perished with no new generation to carry on civilization. Alfonso CuarĂ³n did a great job in creating a setting that fit this societal outlook on life and the morbid sense of hopelessness that pervades through it.

I found the outcome to this situational fact very believable and not too far fetched at all. The world would pretty much go to hell if that were to happen. There would be no point in stemming pollution, being civilized, obeying rules, or furthering mankind because nothing would matter. If you knew that everyone on the planet would be dead in 30 sum years, would anything really matter? I'm not saying that procreation is the way to go, because I'm not very keen on having children, but for a large chunk of society, having kids is a very big deal, and everything those people do from going to work to caring for the environment is directly influenced by the fact that their "legacy" will be walking and talking in that world.

The overall movie was great because it had all of the pieces needed to create an emotionally charged story with characters that the audience could empathize with. Clive Owen did a wonderful job portraying his character as a regular guy who had experienced a great deal of shit throughout his life in this new world. After meeting up with Kee, a newcomer played by Claire-Hope Ashitey, the film started down a whirlwind plot that had me all tensed up through the better part of the last section. I'm not sure how the director did it, but boy was I immersed into the story, as was most of the audience. Music integration was light to medium, but it wasn't the main source of emotion that flowed with this movie. Plot and acting fully carried this one through to the end.

My only qualm has to do with the sound/music right at the conclusion of the film. I know what the director was trying to do, but I just don't agree with the style. If he would've improved on that section with better choices of music and sound, this movie would've been one of those that cause people to sit through the credits, much like the endings of Titanic and Braveheart. This film is definitely a must-see.
Rating - A+

Monday, January 01, 2007

Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby (Comedy 2006)

I didn't think this was funny movie at all. I think I only chuckled two or three times and that's it. The humor was "stupid humor" and that can work for some movies, but not this one. I guess I'm just not game with seeing Will Ferrell in these types of roles considering that I also viewed Anchorman and Elf in a very poor light.

If you like this type of stupid humor, then by all means... But if you're looking for a little more creativity in a comedy then look elsewhere.
Rating - D